The feel of a frog in your hands, the sound of rocks in the dryer, bloody noses, grass stained knees, tick checks, tears on rosy cheeks, big fights, “mama, i love you” notes tucked in my pocket, a million dandelion wishes, and bowl cuts. Always bowl cuts. They are currently known as super weaver and hawk eye (appropriately named after a friends big old farm dog) and I love them with all I have got.
Let me tell you, last week sucked. I will just go out and be honest. There were never ending fights; Battles so big even I shed a few tears. There were punishments to be fulfilled and early bedtimes to insist upon. It was a long, long week. One in which I am so grateful is behind me! And now, these two super humans are outside arm in arm exploring while I am in here surely jinxing that. (Upon editing this, yes, it is a fact: I did jinx this.)
It amazes how one glimpse of them riding bikes together, or one moment of sweetness passed between two chubby hands can make up for ten ugly moments. We are on a roller coaster of ups and downs, learning so much about cooperation and getting along. It isn’t easy, but I really do see progress. I see them using strong voices and big phrases helping them solve their own problems and it gives me so much hope.
Sometimes I wish I could travel to the future, just for a bit, to feel how hard I am going to miss holding little toes in the middle of the night so I can come back and thoroughly drink this up. The fights, the making up, the hugs and the cuddles, the never ending snack delivering. All of it.
I know that if I am lucky, that time will come and I will have empty arms and a full heart. And for now I will sip up these baby cheeks with a straw. They are so deliciously plump and perfect.
What are your ideas for dealing with sibling squabbles? How do you keep sane?
One thought on “alter ego”
I am just trying to sort this out as Li’l D is just starting to show some real jealousy and territorialism. (These are much more minor, so far, than were mine as a small oldest child.)
In the rough moments, I remind myself to take a long view. My mom always asked if she was a bad mom. She believed she was. Taking a long view, I see she did a great job. I try to take the lessons from the less than optimal moments to do better next time, and leave behind as much of the frustration as I can.