the thursday crazies

Lately it has occurred to me, while watching my sweet brother start his new tiny family, how much easier it is to “do” this whole thing with those you love in close proximity.  Stopping in for supper, heading off to the market alone, date nights, overnights, holidays, birthdays, you know the reg…. these things are better done in packs. Packs of those you love and know and have files and files of stored up memories of similar events together.

I keep thinking back to the last four years, the last four moves (the last four states!) and I think about how different this adventure looked without the comfort of my own by my side.

I was once told a story about a mama I admire oh so much, a mama of four children, the oldest being approximately my age, and how she too spent her first few years in motherhood far from the reaches of her own mother and father.  My friend told me, her mama said those were some of the best times.  At the moment I laughed and brushed the comment off.  But, a few years later, the words have stuck with me.

I understand this now.  Though its sad to see the pages on the calendar flip by, or to sob in the doorway with each goodbye, there is one thing I am not thinking about.

Things are hard, you miss your mama, and then times passes, and you join a knitting group.  Or, you start one (woot! woot!  Rustic Knitters!), and you meet some ladies.  And they are your life blood.  Oh my goodness yes.  They are every dose of medicine you could ever need rolled into one evening of laughter and commiseration and wine and french fries and fiber and tears and life and life and life.  Have I told the Lacey’s, Liz’s, Tabatha’s, Danielle’s, Sarah’s, Jess’s, Caitlyn’s, Kerry’s, Beth’s, Laurie’s, Lauren’s, Rebecca’s, and Sheri’s of my life they filled a void for me that I can never repay?  And thank you?  Because Thank you.  Thank you!

Even now, only three hours away, my thursday night knitting crew (we sound badass don’t we?) is all I need to get by.  When these two have the crazies and they are passing them onto me, I take a deep breath, close my eyes, and exhale… my mantra…

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And I say this with a smile on my face… cuz you know the crazies aren’t so bad when you get some time to breathe once in a while…. 

Happy Thursday Everyone!!

with a little help from my friends

Oh this space has been missed since the big journey up north.  I will be back soon for I have much to digest and regurgitate right here, both in photos and words alike.  But for now, all I have to say is I am so grateful for the comforts of a tiny town, lovely friends, and my dear sweet family.  Oh yes, and a new battery charger, I felt next to naked without those few pounds slung around my neck all the time.

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More to come… in the near future.

the wind of my soul

This weekend, at one last family beach trip with some of my favorite friends of the south, I looked around at a sand bar that formed islands as far as I could see, I promise it might have been longer than a mile, at pelicans hovering just inches above the thick salty sea, at my children and my dear friends children nestled in close to one another floating and frolicking in tide pools with grins plastered to their faces, and at my own two feet sunk deep into the sand with a rising tide swirling at my hips.  “This place feels like a vacation”, I thought to myself. “Just when you are leaving.” I admitted.  Waiting this long to realize that is too long.  I will never make the same mistake.  I think  back on all my days with my two feet on the ground I realized that they are all just that.

A vacation of sorts.

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I am glad I am alive.


Moving magnifies the lack of permanence in life.  It forces me reflect on how big my boys were exactly one year ago when we went to the beach for a birthday party, or how my friends babies have grown so since we were last at a picnic, or how much I expected of my oldest when we moved here and he was a mere four months older than my youngest currently is.  It makes me feel the difference deep in my bones and wish that I had a better way to hold on.  But we don’t.  It doesn’t work that way.  You have this.  You have here.

Saying goodbye three times in three years is a lot.  It is sad to see tears in your dear friends eyes when you embrace them until you don’t know when, it is sad to sit in the passengers seat and shed them silently so your children don’t worry with a speechless husband at your side knowing not what to do but stare at the road.  But, more important than a fleeting moment of sadness is the idea that I have these souls speckled across the continent with a bit of me stored somewhere inside them.  And that I had the chance to have all these wonderful memories filed away in me.

IMG_2101 IMG_2120 IMG_2111 Motherhood forms a different type of friendship all together.  The camaraderie and understanding is uncanny to any other stage in my life so far.  We can commiserate and congratulate all at once all with the best intentions and with the eye of a common soul.  These children of ours, they give us so much to think about.  So much to search for and strive for.  So much to smile at.

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I am so grateful for the days we have had here.  Things became quite real to me last night, when handing over some houseplants.  This step of the process always makes the whole thing come to life.  Pictures are stacked in a corner, the walls are bare.  Knick knacks are safely tucked away and the rest awaits for the movers expertise.  Though a constant weight of sadness tugs at my heartstrings, and behind that is a layer of fear, I am ready for the adventure that lies ahead.


I listen to the wind, to the wind of my soul.  Where I will end up i think only god really knows.  -Cat Stevens

Thank you Georgia.  You have been good to me.

everyday is good


I cannot say with certainty what it is about this tiny state that I hold so dear in my heart.  It is likely the memories; The nostalgic feeling I get.  It is possible it’s the family and friends I hold so dear; My people.  There is chance that it is the sights and smells; The glorious deep blue sea.  And of course it is on the whole everything.  Every. Single. Thing. About being here sings home and love and fun.  Just plain old fun.

The garden… which doesn’t even begin to display the beauty my mama manages to transform (the already spectacular grass into) year after year


bubble stomping…

Friends and family and picnics oh my… 

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All without even leaving the rock.

i love chickens more than you do.

Ah out of the mouths of babes.  And not my own for that matter!  We were so content in the presence of a little lady and her loved ones this past weekend.  This girlie was quite smitten with our chickens and knowledgable to boot!  Ahhh.. the trip was so fine.  Mama got a night off from cooking.  Boys were in heaven with love in all directions.  We were showered with gifts and delicious food and good laughs and conversation and music and joy.

There once was a time when visitors produced a stress for me.  The thoughts of an impending change in my here and there induced a bit of anxiety.  But, somewhere along the line this fear faded away.  Perhaps it was when the beauty and loneliness of the country came into play, perhaps it just came with age (you know in a few short years I will be three decades old… which is when you become wise right?) or maybe just maybe I like having another hand in on parenting.  I know its wrong to put guests to work, but quite frankly its unavoidable.  Of course I do not ask that they entertain my outgoing children, but according to my boys entertain they must!  Either way it feels good to see this irrational fear go because these three were nothing but low-key easy-going soft-spoken beautiful friends.

Thanks for the visit y’all.  (Did that sound authentic?)

I only say so because tomorrow I will be saying, “yous’ guys” for I will be back in on the rock as some call it and it feels so good.  Despite the daunting trip, despite runny noses and bad backs, the outcome will be overwhelmingly sweet for that salty air is awaiting. Those overgrown grape viney woods are calling out to my boys.  We will be hollering “land ho” at the low tide in a matter of hours and I will have my most loving mama and daddy around to let me dive deep into the seven seas for some fun of my own.  Friendships up the coast.  I am one lucky gal.

See you soon New Englanders!  And thank you thank you southern friends for the lovely visit.